xoxo
Dear MM,
I needed to write you this email because I want you to know I supported you all the way, whatever you do, you have me. Because no one understand you more than I do.
Finally you left the relationship. You knew you deserve better than just some fraction of what you wanted. As you said, the attachment to your ex lingers. It lingers because you never succeeded in making him fulfill your needs completely. You said it feels as if you failed. You feel that somehow not getting what you wanted was your fault.
If you were only good enough your ex would give you the love you wanted, all of the time. After all, he did give it to you some of the time. It’s not your fault and you are not the one to be blame. If he chooses to behave like a child, let him. You’ve done your part, and your best to salvage the friendship. Most people would feel very angry, and justifiably so. But, anger is a way to stay connected to someone, albeit not a positive way. Anger is one reason he may have difficulty letting go of this relationship. You mentioned you would give him the time and stand by him. But please don’t allow him to hurt you ~ emotionally. It’s not your fault. You have a great life ahead, great career and many friends who love you to death! You are much happier and contented the last time I saw you. And I love seeing this part of you which glow. You will always have me. I’ll stand by you.
XOXO.
I am willing to trust. I know that to the degree I am willing to give up my search for a healthy love relationship, I can have it. I know I can have whatever I am ready and willing to receive. Individual receptivity is everything. Without it, nothing changes. With it, all things are possible. I no longer insist upon my choice.
I know that the only thing I lose when I let go of something I am afraid to live without is the fear itself. I am stronger than anything that frightens me!
I let go of the past, and I am free to think clearly and positively in the present. I am not my past.
Comment by missmynx — April 1, 2008 @ 4:27 am